Far out!

Man I am having a hell of a day.  So here's what's been happening... my husband took my car today because he is doing volunteer work and his car doesn't have a renewed rego (and he already got a $400 ticket because of this but that's another story).  So I decided to walk the 40 minutes to a restaurant to meet other mums from my sons kindy. 

I had both boys there so that was a bit of a mission but I wasn't hungover so was able to cope.  We walked back home another 40 min so I was pretty tuckered out.. my littlest fell asleep in the pram so I carried him in but of course he woke up.  So now it's no rest time, right in to lunch etc. 

Then I had to tidy the house for a viewing at 1:45 (house is on the market and though we agreed we would have open homes only, there seems to be heaps of viewings by appointment and you can imagine the nightmare that is with a 1 and a 3 year old!).  So I vaccumed, hung the washing, folded all other washing and put away, picked up all the toys, did all the dishes, cleaned the counter tops etc etc.... got the boys out the door (another misison since we had been out all morning and they wanted to stay home).

We went for a walk and in all actuallity I was starting to feel better.  I felt like phew - Bwendo is right, just go for a walk... we went to a little park, looked at some fallen leaves and had a good play.  We came back to the house but the cars were still here.. 45 min later!  So we carried on walking.  After another 20 min we came back and the real estate agent was still here.  She said the couple also looked at the house across the street because it is coming on the market next week.  CRAP!  A house across the street - that sucks.

So I come in and decide to treat myself to  a fizzy drink (which I try to limit but am allowing myself because I'm not having alcohol and I feel I need something).  I open the fridge door and out the pepsi comes, flying across the room, lid breaks and fizzy drink (soda) goes EVERYWHERE!  This after I had just cleaned the whole house!  So I had to get towels etc and clean it up - of course with my 3 year old asking me why I did that (if I weren't so overwhelmed, I'd find that hilarious).  So I clean it up.. they start asking for snacks so I have to get the sheets to put on the floor because we have carpets in the eating area and we've cleaned the carpets and don't want to stain them again... the kids are making their regular demands about what they want to eat and I just lose it. 

I thought I'd be able to cope better without alcohol but at least at the end of the day I can have a drink and calm down.  I find this is all too much for me.  I don't know if it's becuase there is so much going on or if this is normal for people trying to stop drinking.  I keep thinking maybe this isn't the right time then I think is that just an excuse?  All I know is that I am a millimetre away from saying fuck it.  And drinking.